The 72-year-old in the bright red jacket walks into the café like she owns the light. Not in a loud way, more in that quiet, grounded way that makes people look up from their phones. She asks the barista how his exam went, remembers his dog’s name, tips too much, laughs at her own bad joke. A teenager at the next table nudges her boyfriend and whispers, “She’s so cool, I wanna be like that when I’m old.”
We’ve all been there, that moment when you spot someone older who looks… fully alive. Not pretending to be 30, not clinging to anything, just vividly themselves. You catch yourself thinking, “I hope I turn out like that.”
# There’s a Pattern to Those People
People who succeed in life often share similar traits. You can notice these characteristics when you look closely at their behavior and choices. Successful individuals tend to wake up early. They use the morning hours to plan their day and work on important tasks before distractions appear. This habit gives them a head start while others are still sleeping. They read regularly. Books & articles help them learn new skills & understand different perspectives. Reading expands their knowledge & keeps their minds sharp. These people set clear goals. They know what they want to achieve and create plans to reach those targets. Without specific goals they would wander without direction. They maintain healthy routines. Exercise and proper nutrition give them energy throughout the day. A healthy body supports a focused mind. Successful people build strong relationships. They surround themselves with supportive friends and mentors who encourage growth. These connections provide guidance during difficult times. They embrace failure as a learning opportunity. Mistakes don’t stop them because they view setbacks as chances to improve. Each failure teaches valuable lessons. Time management is another common trait. They prioritize important tasks & avoid wasting hours on meaningless activities. Every minute counts toward their larger objectives. These individuals stay curious about the world. They ask questions and seek to understand how things work. Curiosity drives innovation and creative problem solving. They practice gratitude daily. Appreciating what they have keeps them motivated & positive. Gratitude shifts focus from what’s missing to what’s present. Successful people take responsibility for their actions. They don’t blame others when things go wrong. Owning mistakes allows them to fix problems and move forward. The pattern becomes clear when you study these habits. Success isn’t random or based on luck alone. It comes from consistent actions & deliberate choices that anyone can adopt.
1. Still saying yes to invitations (even when it’s tempting to stay home)
At 70 the couch can become a very persuasive friend. The knees ache a little and the weather is not perfect and traffic looks annoying. One no turns into ten & suddenly weeks blur into one long loop of the same chair and the same TV and the same mug. The people who make others whisper I hope I am like that almost always do one simple thing. They keep saying yes. Not to everything. Not to every obligation. To life.
They still show up to birthday drinks, art openings, grandchildren’s school shows. They go to that neighbor’s barbecue where they only know two people and the dog. They say, “I’ll come for an hour” and end up staying three, because they’re curious about who they’ll meet, what they’ll feel, what story they’ll collect to tell later.
Take Robert, 71, who almost skipped his friend’s retirement party because “everyone will be talking about work I left ten years ago.” He went anyway. At the bar, he started chatting with a woman about the terrible music playlist. She turned out to run a community choir three streets away. Six months later, he’s singing every Thursday night and has a WhatsApp group that won’t stop roasting his fashion sense.
There’s no big Hollywood moment there. Just one small “yes” that opened twenty new doors. Studies keep showing that people with diverse social interactions age better, feel less lonely, recover faster from illness. But you don’t need a study to see it. You see it in the sparkle of someone who still has places to be, and people who notice when they’re not there.
When you start declining invitations the world begins to shrink in ways you do not immediately notice. At first you skip events that happen in the evening. Then you avoid going out during winter. Eventually you turn down anything that seems like it requires too much effort. Your friends gradually stop reaching out because they expect you to say no. Many people believe you need energy before you can accept invitations. The truth works differently. Invitations themselves create energy. You leave the house feeling exhausted but return home feeling alive and energized.
The simple truth is that people remember the older person who keeps showing up. They do not remember the one who always has an excuse for why they cannot make it. The people we quietly admire in their seventies are rarely the most talented or the luckiest ones. They are the ones who continued showing up long after it became socially acceptable to retreat into comfortable routines.
2. Moving your body like it’s a non-negotiable part of the day
The 70-year-olds people secretly look up to are not necessarily running marathons. Many of them just… walk. Every day. They stretch in the kitchen while the kettle boils. They dance badly to old songs while brushing their teeth. They treat movement like brushing their hair: ordinary, not heroic.
➡️ Meteorologists warn early February could mark the beginning of an Arctic destabilization event
# Psychology Explains Why People Who Grew Up Being the Strong One Struggle to Rest as Adults
Many people who were labeled as the strong one during childhood find it nearly impossible to relax when they become adults. This pattern has deep psychological roots that affect how they view themselves and interact with the world. Children who take on the role of family caretaker or emotional support system learn early that their value comes from being useful to others. They become experts at reading the room and responding to what everyone else needs. Over time this becomes their identity rather than just a temporary role. These individuals often grew up in households where they had to be mature beyond their years. Perhaps a parent struggled with illness or addiction. Maybe there was financial stress or family conflict that required them to step up. Whatever the reason they learned that showing vulnerability was not an option. The problem is that this survival strategy does not turn off automatically in adulthood. The brain has been wired to associate rest with danger or selfishness. When they try to take a break their nervous system sends alarm signals. They feel guilty for not being productive or worry that something bad will happen if they let their guard down. Research in psychology shows that chronic hypervigilance changes how the brain processes stress. The body stays in a constant state of alert even when there is no real threat. This makes genuine relaxation feel uncomfortable or even frightening. Adults who were the strong one as children often struggle with several specific issues. They have difficulty asking for help because they learned that their needs should come last. They feel responsible for managing other people’s emotions even when it is not their job. They equate their worth with their productivity and usefulness. Breaking this pattern requires recognizing that the rules that helped them survive childhood no longer serve them. Rest is not laziness but a biological necessity. Vulnerability is not weakness but a sign of healthy relationships. Their value as a person exists independent of what they do for others. Therapy can help these individuals learn to set boundaries & practice self-compassion. They need to understand that taking care of themselves does not mean abandoning others. In fact they can only truly help people when they are not running on empty themselves. The journey toward rest involves retraining both mind and body. It means sitting with the discomfort that comes when they stop moving. It requires challenging the internal voice that says they are only worthwhile when they are solving problems or supporting others. Learning to rest is not about becoming lazy or selfish. It is about recognizing that everyone deserves care including themselves. The strong ones of childhood can become the balanced adults who know when to help & when to step back.
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➡️ A rare polar vortex shift is taking shape, and experts warn that February could bring unusually extreme winter conditions
A winter storm warning has been issued as forecasters predict up to 55 inches of snow could fall in the affected areas. The heavy snowfall threatens to overwhelm local roads and rail networks. Meteorologists are warning residents to prepare for significant travel disruptions as the storm system moves through the region. The massive accumulation of snow could make many routes impassable and cause serious delays to train services. Local authorities are urging people to avoid unnecessary travel during the storm. Emergency services are preparing for potential power outages and stranded motorists as conditions deteriorate. The storm is expected to bring sustained heavy snowfall over several days. Transportation officials are working to position snow removal equipment and crews in strategic locations ahead of the worst weather. Residents in the warning area should stock up on essential supplies and make sure they have emergency kits ready. Schools and businesses may need to close if conditions become too dangerous for travel. Rail operators are already adjusting schedules & may suspend services entirely if snow accumulation reaches dangerous levels. Road crews will focus on keeping major highways clear but many secondary roads could become blocked. The weather service recommends that anyone who must travel should carry emergency supplies in their vehicle including blankets food, water and a flashlight. Drivers should also keep their gas tanks full & let others know their travel plans. This storm has the potential to be one of the most significant winter weather events in recent years for the region.
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➡️ France has already received two authorization requests for mini nuclear reactors – and the latest one makes a strong case
One woman I met who is 74 years old calls it her contract with tomorrow. She walks for 25 minutes around the same block whether the weather is good or bad. Her neighbors wave at her when she passes by. Children riding scooters sometimes race her to the corner. She does not count her steps or track them. Instead she tracks how consistently she shows up. The human body responds well to that kind of regular commitment.
The biggest trap at 70 is believing that slowing down has to mean stopping. A doctor tells you to “take it easy”, and you translate that as “sit more”. A small pain arrives, and fear does the rest. Soon you’re avoiding stairs, skipping outings that involve any walking, taking the car for distances you used to enjoy.
That’s how confidence in your body erodes: not with one injury, but with a hundred tiny avoidances. Contrast that with someone who says, “Okay, maybe not hiking, but I can do the park bench circuit,” and keeps going. They adapt, not surrender. Their grandchildren grow up thinking, “Grandma always walks everywhere,” not “Grandma always sits and watches.”
At seventy years old the focus of movement shifts away from concerns about weight or how you look. Instead it becomes about maintaining your dignity. What matters is being able to stand up from a chair on your own. It means carrying your groceries without assistance. It involves stepping onto a train without worrying about the space between the platform and the carriage. These small acts of independence are what allow people to remain the main character in their own story rather than becoming a background figure who depends on others for basic tasks.
Let’s be honest: nobody really does this every single day. There are off weeks, off months, surgeries, winters that swallow motivation whole. The key is not perfection. The key is refusing to call it “over” after every setback. The 70-year-old others admire is the one who says, “Right. Starting again. Just ten minutes,” and laces their shoes anyway.
3. Staying genuinely curious about people younger than you
There’s a particular kind of older person who makes everyone relax. They don’t start sentences with “In my day” or “Your generation…”. They ask, “So what are you into?” and actually listen. At 70, still caring about the lives, memes, music, and worries of people decades younger than you is almost a superpower.
It doesn’t mean pretending to love everything. It means not closing the door. It means letting your nephew show you his favorite YouTuber and asking why he likes them. It means listening to your granddaughter rant about climate anxiety without cutting in to say, “We had problems too, you know.”
Think about someone like Fatima who is 70 years old & volunteers once a week at a youth center to help with homework. She does not go there to teach them discipline. She goes because she enjoys their chaos and their slang & their wild plans. In return they show her new apps & new music and new jokes. She does not always understand everything. Sometimes she laughs at the wrong moment. This exchange works because neither side pretends to be something else. Fatima does not act like she understands everything about their world. The young people do not treat her like she is outdated. They meet in the middle where curiosity lives. She learns that their music has meaning even when it sounds like noise to her. They learn that her stories about the past connect to problems they face now.
Still, when she walks in, a chorus of “Fatiiiima!” rings out. She’s part of the room, not an observer standing in the corner judging. Years from now, those kids will tell their own children about “this older lady who was cooler than half the staff.”
Curiosity at 70 sends a very loud silent message: “I haven’t retired from life.” It says, “Your world matters to me, even if it’s not mine.” People feel that. They feel the difference between an older person who interrogates and one who explores.
The people we look up to keep learning about others throughout their lives. They talk to waiters about their backgrounds and ask teenagers about their video games and check in with nurses about their work schedules. This behavior has nothing to do with trying to seem cool. They simply choose not to let their emotional life become limited to memories of earlier times. This mindset spreads to those around them. After spending time with such people you find yourself thinking that you want to stay curious & engaged as you age instead of becoming resentful & uninterested.
4. Allowing yourself to still change your mind
There is something appealing about a 70-year-old who can say that they were wrong or that they used to think differently. Many people treat their opinions like concrete by that age. The ones we quietly admire treat them more like clay. Their views are still firm & still shaped but not untouchable.
Maybe you grew up with a certain view on relationships, money, careers. Then your grandchildren start living very different lives. At 70, doubling down is easy. Softening takes courage. Saying, “I don’t fully understand, but I’m trying,” is a bridge. And bridges are what make people say, “I hope I’m like that.”
Look at technology. There are 70-year-olds who still brag about not knowing how to send a text. Then there are the ones who say, “Show me again, I’ll get it this time,” even if it takes ten tries. The second group tends to have more voice notes from their grandchildren, more shared photos, more spontaneous “thinking of you” messages.
The point isn’t speed or skill. It’s the humility of admitting, “I’m learning.” That phrase is disarming coming from someone with decades of life behind them. It tells younger people, “You don’t have to be done yet either.” There’s something deeply reassuring about that.
“The day you stop changing your mind is the day you start rehearsing being dead.”
- Notice topics where you always say the same thing. Ask yourself: “When did I last update this opinion?”
- Let one younger person a week explain something without interrupting with your version.
- Practice one small reversal: try the food you always say you hate, change your walking route, switch your newspaper.
- When you feel defensive, say out loud (even just to yourself): “Interesting. Tell me more about how you see it.”
- Write one sentence you believed at 30 that you don’t believe now. That’s proof you can still evolve.
5. Keeping a private project that belongs only to you
The 70-year-olds who radiate something special almost always have a secret world. A balcony garden where they experiment with impossible tomatoes. A half-finished novel in a drawer. A carefully chaotic workshop full of wood shavings and half-born ideas. A language they’re learning slowly, badly, stubbornly.
They’re not just “Grandma” or “the retired engineer” or “the widow from number 12”. They’re also the person who is trying to play jazz on a cheap keyboard, or indexing family photos, or training for a charity walk. That inner project gives their days shape that doesn’t depend on anyone else’s schedule.
What younger people notice is not the project itself. It’s the light behind it. The way their face changes when they talk about the seedlings that finally sprouted, or the tricky passage in the song they almost nailed, or the local history they’re digging through. There’s pride and frustration and joy in equal measure. It’s alive.
*A private project reminds you that you still have a future, even if it’s just “next Tuesday I’ll try that again.”* It keeps your brain stretching, your hands busy, your heart slightly nervous. That nervousness is underrated. It’s proof that you still care about how something turns out.
What kills this at 70 is the voice that says, “What’s the point now?” As if the only valid projects are the ones that bring money or public applause. The point is the process. The point is that when someone asks, “What have you been up to?” you have an answer that is not about your last medical appointment.
The older person people want to emulate is rarely the one with the smoothest life. It’s the one who still has things on their own to-do list that nobody else put there. Their days feel authored, not just scheduled around other people’s needs. That’s what makes you look at them and think, with a mixture of admiration and relief, “So it doesn’t have to be over. Not like that.”
6. Giving out warmth on purpose
Spend ten minutes watching a truly vibrant 70-year-old in public. You’ll see it: the small compliments, the easy greetings, the way they smooth tension around them. They talk to the supermarket cashier like an equal. They say “Nice jacket” to the shy guy in the waiting room. They send texts that say, “Thinking of you, no need to reply.”
This isn’t about being fake cheerful. It’s about choosing to be a net contributor of warmth rather than waiting to receive it. At 70, that choice changes every room you walk into, including your own kitchen. People slowly start to think of you as a source, not a drain. They come towards you, not away.
Of course some days you don’t feel like it. Pain flares, bad news arrives, sleep was a disaster. You don’t have to perform joy. A soft, “I’m having a rough day” said gently can still be warm. What turns people off is the constant sharpness: the permanent complaining, the criticism of everything new, the automatic assumption of the worst.
The admired 70-year-olds still get angry, still cry, still swear at the news. They just don’t let bitterness become their main flavor. Young people especially are allergic to that. They lean in to elders who offer some kind of kindness, even if it’s wrapped in sarcasm. They pull back from those who always bite.
When you reach 70 years old your face shows a lot about your life. The wrinkles near your eyes reveal how often you have smiled or frowned or felt concerned. You cannot change what is already there. You can decide what new experiences you want to add going forward. A kind word does not cost anything but it makes a bigger impact than you might expect.
Those small, steady gestures of warmth are the reason someone, one day, will look at you across a crowded bus, see the way you help a stranger with a bag or laugh with a child, and think without quite knowing why: “I hope I’m like that when I’m older.”
Letting yourself stay unfinished
There’s a quiet secret running through all these nine things: they all resist the idea that 70 is some final, polished version of you. The people who impress us in their seventies haven’t “figured it all out”. They’re still a bit messy. They still get lost on the way to new places. They still have days when toast for dinner wins. They still ask a teenager which button to press on the ticket machine.
They’re not trying to be ageless. They’re not pretending nothing hurts. They just refuse to be only their age. They say yes to invitations more than they say no. They move their body more than the world expects. They stay curious, keep changing their mind, hold onto a project that’s just for them, offer warmth when they have it. None of that requires perfect health, perfect money, or perfect anything.
What it asks for is a kind of stubborn gentleness with yourself. It means promising that as long as you wake up you still get to add a line to the story instead of just rereading the old chapters. That version of being 70 makes younger people exhale & think with sudden unexpected hope that maybe getting older could feel like that.
| Key point | Detail | Value for the reader |
|---|---|---|
| Keep saying yes | Accept social invitations, stay visible in other people’s lives | Preserves relationships, reduces loneliness, keeps life feeling bigger |
| Move every day | Walk, stretch, adapt movement to your body instead of stopping | Protects independence, confidence and everyday freedom |
| Stay curious and warm | Ask questions, change your mind, offer small daily kindness | Makes you someone others admire spending time with at any age |
FAQ:
- Isn’t 70 too late to change my habits?Late is usually just another word for uncomfortable. Change feels strange at first at any age, but the brain and body still respond to new routines well into your eighties.
- What if my health is limited?Then the “nine things” shrink to fit your reality: smaller walks, shorter outings, quieter projects, softer warmth. The spirit of them matters more than the scale.
- I don’t have many friends left. How can I still “say yes”?Say yes to community spaces: libraries, local classes, faith groups, volunteer roles, even online groups. One new acquaintance is enough to get momentum going again.
- How do I stay curious when I feel disconnected from modern life?Pick one younger person and ask them to explain one thing a week: a song, an app, a news story. Treat it like a language course in “today”.
- What if I’m just tired of trying?Then start as small as humanly possible: one short walk, one kind message, one new recipe, one fresh question. Momentum often returns quietly once the first tiny action is done.
